Yellow cats prowl the neighborhood. She has come, the Lady of the Lake. I expected her cloak of white, her hair of ephemeral snow, and her rasping howl. The cats are not hers, although I could imagine creatures trotting at her feet, purring, and observing the wake through golden eyes translucent as honey agate. Instead, the cats belong to the county — grand Caterpillar road graders the color of working-man gold. They’ve come to plow what the Lady has wrought.
In all my life, I’ve known snow. Last winter was my first experience in a warmer climate (Mars) and even there I marched for justice and voice in half a foot of snow at the Kanab Women’s March. Yet, this is my first time experiencing lake-effect snow. It’s a weather phenomenon easily given over to myth and mystery because the science reads like fiction. According to air temperature over water temperature, the result can be snow, blizzard or thundersnow.
It’s the Lady. I’ve hunted the shores of Lake Superior to develop a deep respect, awe and healthy fear of her depths and power. Some days she pelts my calves with tumbled rocks like a mischievous sprite. Other days she intimidates the combers with roars and riptides. I’ve glimpsed her on the North Shore of Minnesota where I first fell in love with Lake Superior. I’ve bobbed in her gentle waves at Chequemegon Bay in northern Wisconsin. Now, I’m seeing her take shape as she rises to the land of the Keweenaw Peninsula in Michigan.
Think about it — lake-effect snow is a visitation. Science or myth, it’s amazing to behold.
During the Flash Fiction Rodeo, Carrot Ranch had visitors of another kind — spammers. Because I pay for WordPress, I have hearty spam filters in place. Sometimes, too hearty. I’ve learned to check it frequently for the occasional writer who gets nabbed for no discernible reason. The spam never makes it through. But with the forms we used spammers did get inventive (such as copying and pasting their spam message in every required field). A few got through.
While it could have been the opening to a murderous musing, I doubt the Cialis ad qualified for Sherri Matthew’s Rodeo #7. Soon after, a dubious person named Male Enhancement began following the Ranch. Sherri quipped perhaps we were on someone’s target list because of her dongle, which had come up in conversation through comments. As naughty of a word as dongle sounds, especially in the presence of those selling vasodilators, it is a technology devise to enhance internet receptivity. Oh, the lurking innuendo in all of that.
And that’s why another piece of spam caught us off guard. Was it brilliant innuendo? Was is intentionally misspelled and miscalculated to look like spam, but be humorous? It was submitted to the Funny Man himself, Geof Le Pard of Little & Laugh Rodeo #2 for which the winner will be revealed on Tuesday, November 13. We laughed. We said, truly this is spam, and then we wondered. Norah Colvin, educator that she is, pointed out the plausible intention behind the content and its errors. One of the L&L judges suggested she might even know this character.
A character he is (or she). We’ll pick a gender and go with he to balance the Lady of the Lake. Both blow over Carrot Ranch in a shroud of mystery with a hint of playfulness. He, our humor spammer, is Nanjo Castille. While disqualified, we will share this clever spam that pulled our chain as an entry to Little & Laugh:
Website Overstock
Hello Mrs Geoffarey DuParts. How are you for ten dollars? Or just a $20?
i am Nanjo. I have lots of extra high end luxyry purses and handbags because of website overstock gilch.
Are you intestrested? Let me explain to you how this works, Mrrs Geofarai:
Perfume and excessories all loaded up ready to ship out. The man came in and fool#s forch lift broke down. Cant transport stock out of the building. Gfppd fpr the gppse. Good for the gander/. Hence shooting off quick message in your FAQ bored.
Some of the finest stitching amd sewing work in many of the persfume bptt;es.
Not only that but you will find purses and hand bags of Ralphiger, Verskatche, Mr. Tommy Rott, and Coco Carmel.
How much would you be willing to me for this in money? A very little amount of bitcoin?
$20? For as little as $20 of BiTCHcoin we candei;ver to you a fine Channel bag and perfume for just £20. Reverse the other side of it, and it will fill your home with deliicsours vagrance!
>>>>This is 1 time deal because of warehouse overstock. Lots of high end
>>>> merch including Coochi, Pravda and Choco Caramel handbags.
Fo go go! No time!
By bi.
Najno/
Whether it was intentional or not, Nanjo harvested laughs among Rodeo Leaders. The only clue to his name was the email which we all avoided like the plague. Charming as Nanjo Castille might be, funny, nonetheless, we didn’t want to get sucked into his sketchy world. And if perchance you are a writer now realizing you absolutely fooled us with what was meant to “read” like spam for the sake of a good guffaw, fess up!
Writers are fond of personifying snow and lakes, imagining the lives of people in house we pass, and studying circumstances for stories. So, we are going to make up the life of Nanjo Castille.
November 9, 2017 prompt: In 99 words (no more, no less) write a fictional story about The Real Nanjo Castille. You can set any gender, era or genre to reveal the character behind the mystery. You can also imagine the daily life of The Real Nanjo Castille. Go where the prompt leads.
Respond by November 14, 2017 to be included in the compilation (published November 15). Rules are here. All writers are welcome!
Interesting, but when I sat down to write my response I was thinking of all the funny stories we’d get. I’m a NaNo Rebel, revising Miracle of Ducks this month, so I chose to question what interaction my character might have with Nanjo. As what happens often, what I set out to write did not end up on the page. And I was struck by the lack of humor. Instead the irony of those who witnessed history being told it happened differently appeared.
I mention this to encourage you to go beyond your expectations. This is your time to explore. You never know what you will discover.
***
Interviewing the Real Nanjo Castille by Charli Mills
Danni pressed record, fluffing the sound muffler Ike called “The Muppet.” Today, she had access to living history. An elderly man called “The Real Nanjo Castille.”
Wrinkled and shrunken, he hunched beneath a blanket in a wheelchair. “I was born the year they assassinated my father, Pancho Castille.”
“1923. What were you told about your father?”
“He was a great revolutionary. He captured Buffalo Soldiers after Americans attacked our border towns.”
“Wasn’t it the other way around? Castille’s forces attacked US towns, stealing gold coins and burning a purse factory.”
“Why interview me if you already know the story?”
###
“Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya…You killed my father, Nanjo Castille…Prepare to die!”
Your post today, about another unexpected reward of the Rodeo, is frakkin’ hilarious!
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PERFECT! The neighbors are going to why to know why I’m roaring with laughter! It’s not the snow! 😀 Awesome Nanjo response!
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[…] November 9: Flash Fiction Challenge November 9, 2017 prompt: In 99 words (no more, no less) write a fictional story about The Real Nanjo Castille. You can set any gender, era or genre to reveal the character behind the mystery. You can also imagine the daily life of The Real Nanjo Castille. Go where the prompt leads. Respond by November 14, 2017 to be included in the compilation (published November 15). […]
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https://rantingalong.wordpress.com/2017/11/09/99-word-prompt-musing-on-a-spammer/
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All I can say is that great minds think alike.
I had not read your post first…
Really I didn’t.
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No worries. It’s bound to happen once in a while. 🙂
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I never read the entries before I write either. I don’t know if it would make a difference but I like to keep a clear mind. It is interesting when you come across others on the same wave length yet the stories are always told differently.
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Great use of the external story taking a different path from the internal one. I enjoyed the karmic twist!
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Thanks. 🙂
Can you just imagine the planning that went into getting on the show at the same time? That might be a story all its own.
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I often think of the planning some criminals do and marvel that they wouldn’t rather apply the skill toward good.
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I may have to come up with another one … but this sort of fits… with giggles:
“To Tell The Truth”
“To Tell The Truth”
~
There they were, three people on the panel. All claimed
to be Nanjo Castille. Each of the four Judges got to ask
questions. Charli, Geoff, Sherri and Norah.
Norah started with; “Where did you go to school? Your
Grammar and spelling are atrocious.
“Hard Knocks,” said One.
Geoff quipped through tears of laughter; “Where’d you
come up with ‘Bitchcoin’?
“My dog had puppies,” said Two.
Sherri wondered out loud; “What bridge do you troll under?”
“Took over from the Billies…” said Three
Charli quirried; “Did you know you remind me of Lake
Michigan?”
“We know!” The ‘Three’ said in Unison.
~
©JP/dh
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I like it!
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Oh, Jules. You crack me up. This is hilarious. Well done.
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Hi Jules! Good to see you having some from. But Wordsmith, what is quirried? Sounds like Charli’s gone squirrely (alas, that’s likely).
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http://www.dictionary.com/browse/queried
oops one to many rrrrr’ss arrrgh!
query: a question; an inquiry.
queries: pulural
so wouldn’t queried be questioned?
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A curious one with conflicting letters, I see. All I can say is having worked in magazine publishing, it’s “query” letters writers send to pitch an article, and when an editor has questions for the writer’s article she “queries” in return. I rather like quirried. And it seems he “i” more likely to represent the inquiry it is. Knowing your precision with language, however, I mentioned it.
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scheduled for 10th Nov.
https://pensitivity101.wordpress.com/?p=22957
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Your link doesn’t work. Don’t tell me — you were doing one on “To Tell the Truth” and saw that 2 other people did that before you. 🙂
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My post isn’t due to go live until tomorrow as we’re away for the day. Nope, mine is totally different!
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LOL! The link won’t be available until tomorrow. 🙂
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Di, I admire your organization! Glad to be on the schedule. 🙂
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🙂
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Brilliant!! 😀 I think he/she/it/they deserves their own rodeo for sure!
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The person behind the entry was having some fun and clever enough to share it. It was a side show for certain!
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OMG! That’s hysterical. I get some insane spam too, but that was priceless. I’ll be working on a new flash and posting soon. Thanks for the great laugh! 😀 ❤
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This is so spam-like in language and yet unlike spam it has meaning. Nanjo is communicating. But to what end — fun, perhaps? We cautiously accepted it in that spirit.
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I’ve gotten many spam like this. I think it’s the way English translates that makes it so funny. The pure genius was using his name as a writing ✍🏻 prompt. ☺️ ❤️
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He’ll get his day in the spotlight, but alas, no forklifts to move his product. 🙂
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[…] taking a chance on one of Charli’s 99-word prompts over at The Carrot […]
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That is really too funny! Some of the spam I get is hysterical too!
Here’s my entry!
http://butismileanyway.com/2017/11/09/flash-fiction-challenge-the-real-nanjo-castille-carrotranch-flashfiction-charli_mills/
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Sometimes I laugh at the spam absurdity, but this was truly an effort! Thanks for taking on our Spammer in Residence.
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I think I’m a Nanjo-ist fan!
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Ha! We might have to start a new group!
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Reblogged this on All About Writing and more.
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Thanks for sharing the spam humor, Henrietta!
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You are welcome!
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[…] Written for: https://carrotranch.com/2017/11/09/november-9-flash-fiction-challenge-2/ […]
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https://summerstommy.com/2017/11/09/november-9-flash-fiction-challenge-nanjos-new-pitch/
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We see him at his craft, trying, really trying, but missing the acceptability mark. Good one, Michael!
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[…] response to Charli’s prompt where she […]
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Just as funny as it was then. Mine https://irenewaters19.com/2017/11/10/a-day-in-the-life-of-nanjo-castille-99-word-flash-fiction/
Lake Superior sound like a being in herself. It is obviously huge. How many states border it?
Love your flash. There are always two sides to every story. This part of your history has recently got me in via a novel and I’m hoping now with more time I might find out more. Nanjo at least had a long life so he didn’t starve to death by Duparts not buying anything.
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The different takes on poor ‘Nanjo’ could make a booket all by it loonsome.
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What a great idea.
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Only problem is getting permission from the ‘real’ Nanny… or just not printing that part. Would the booklet still make sense then? With a limited explanation?
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I wonder if spam comes under copyright laws. Would you want to own up that you had written it?
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I was just thinking of freedom of the press… there was an email that no one wanted to address… :S
Too much for me to sort through right now but some interesting info here:
http://www.offthepagecreations.com/legal_issues_internet.php
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These things can put the fear of god into you. Interesting info. Thanks for link.
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Copyright applies to all literary works. For our purposes weekly, I do advise in the rules: “Carrot Ranch will share responses with readers in a published weekly compilation. Authors retain full rights.” Thus submitting or linking to a challenge implies consent. Publishing a book (like a collection or anthology or including an excerpt) requires adherence to copyright laws. It gets even more complicated with global distribution and I had to sign legal documents for Vol. 1, stating I had permission. The collection will require consent, too. And no, I’m not emailing Nanjo! This is his day in the spotlight.
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Lake Superior feels like a being, perhaps because of its size and ability to create its own weather and environment. It borders three states and Canada with 2,783 km of shore. I’m in daily awe, always aware of Lake Superior’s presence.
Ha! I hadn’t thought of Mr. Duparts starving poor Nanjo, left with his broken forklift and knockoffs. I’m glad it still rings humorous and that we could share some chuckles.
Oh, what book are you reading?
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That is a lot of coastline. The book was by Katherine Sinclair called Dare to Dream. I was surprised by the history in this book and it was a part of American History I know next to nothing about.
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Is it an older book? I think I read that once.
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Love this post, Charli. It’s great to have a touch a humour to warm the heart when it’s cold outside. I’m going to enjoy responding to this challenge. It’s a good opportunity to TUFF it out. 🙂
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Now that I’ve written my post about Nanjo’s education, I can come back and have a read of the other submissions. I’ve been looking forward to it. Here’s a link to mine: https://wp.me/p3O5Jj-10u
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I’m glad this all unfolded with humor and even Nanjo himself responded, though he did through the same route of spam. TUFF love to Nanjo. We’ll play, but cautiously. 🙂
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I think it’s wise to be cautious. 🙂
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I knew who this person was as soon as I finished reading and having a good giggle.
Fatal Error
by Ann Edall-Robson
“What have you done?”
“I’ve been watching you. It didn’t look hard. I created a name and took a run at it. ”
“But why, when I promised I’d help you set everything up to sell your bags?”
“I’m old, impatient, and I don’t see what the big deal is. It still turns on and off.”
“It’s not a light switch, it’s my computer. The one I’m writing my next book on.”
“If you were going to show me how to use it, you should be able to fix it!”
“Oooohhhh, Nana Jo Castle, if only it were that easy.”
http://www.annedallrobson.com/99-words/fatal-error
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Ha! I love where you went with this one, Ann, though I admit I’d be a bit more panicked over a fatal error on my writing computer. Great name for an elder intent on figuring out the new fangled technology herself!
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So much fun with this one Charli!
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I could tell, Ann!
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[…] Carrot Ranch […]
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Thanks for including the Ranch!
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Hi Charli,
I loved your post and the spam entry to Geoff’s contest . There is just something about it which makes me feel a bit dubious. It is maybe just a bit too ‘clever’ to be real spam. So I came up with the following idea for my 99 word story.
Here goes:
The Anagrammer
She looked at her screen and let out a huge, belly-filled hoot.
She had done it. Fooled them all. She laughed harder as she pictured them imagining her as Nanjo Castille. Could they see a wide sombrero hat and thick stripy poncho?
Where was mousey Ms Stelliac now? Never one to joke around at school she was making up for it now. On their blogs and in these contests. She was the Queen of Pranks.
They had even missed the last clue in the text – a second anagram, Najno.
Joann grinned from ear to ear. Spamming was such fun!
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You could have hit the nail on the head with this one Juliet. I love the thought of someone out there loving us loving it.
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Hi Juliet! Yes, I know what you mean. It really is clever and reeks of an intelligent prankster. Norah Colvin picked up on those “misspellings” that seem deliberate, too when we discussed it for the Rodeo. We were let off the hook by the word count. It wsn’t close. But then, that’s probably intentional too. I like where you went with this! Great flash!
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[…] For Carrot Ranch Flash Fiction Challenge […]
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Here is my entry
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Great futuristic flash!
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[…] November 9- Flash Fiction Challenge […]
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https://reinventionsreena.wordpress.com/2017/11/10/mysterious/
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Very interesting…. It makes me think that some of the children may have gone missing…
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Wow! That is an extension of the story…
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I thought possibly the same but then I thought Walt wouldn’t have wanted to sign him if there was any question of funny business – although these days who knows.
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Some masks are more valuable kept. Great flash, Reena!
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Thanks!
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As usual with these challenges I have retold an historical story, this time including a non-existent person.
The French General read the letter and smiled, the English were on the run.
“This Nanjo Castille is certainly our best agent, he seems to know exactly what they are doing. We march at dawn.”
“But the reinforcements and supplies haven’t arrived.”
“Read the message, they are demoralised, they have lost supplies, it will be the victory we need if we can catch them soon.”
Two weeks later, as he looked across the ruins of the army at the impregnable defences, the Lines of Torres Vedras, he cursed Nanjo Castille.
“Find him, kill him, he has cost us Spain.”
The second story looks at the same events from the other side.
Wellington looked across the battlefield at the retreating French, they had fallen into his trap and been decisively defeated.
“I never thought they would believe it.”
“Ever since we broke their codes we have been able to deceive them. But I must admit that the success of Nanjo Castille was unexpected.”
“Who is Nanjo Castille?” Wellington asked.
The spymaster pointed to two clerks.
“NAthaNiel Chalk and JOhn Castle. They made that name up out of their own names, and the French swallowed everything.”
He laughed, “We march at dawn, if all goes well, Nanjo Castille will have freed Spain.”
The Lines of Torres Vedras were a remarkable series of defences built by the Duke of Wellington through Portugal and Spain, in a brilliant campaign he tricked the French into advancing into his trap, where they were decisively defeated.
The British had cracked the French military codes, they not only read the enemy dispatches but also disseminated misinformation.
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Enjoyed your history and particularly looking at the same story from different perspectives. This happens in history all the time and each country has its own version of events.
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Gordon, I love these two creations of yours! You are a true historian able to take a techno-babble modern circumstance and show its possible mirror image back in time. And with a period of history you must enjoy. Thank you for these two stories that use a fictional Nanjo to explore the codebreaking in Wellington’s campaign.
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Thanks for coming in, Mr. Castille. Have a seat.
Thank you.
What are you doing?
I’m taking the chair.
No, I meant to sit in.
What is good for Gestapo is good for gander, right?
I don’t think that’s it.
Nice for you having me at your bored meeting. Very FAQ. Very yawn introducing.
Right. About the bags.
The bags, yes. $10 apiece.
Are they knock-offs?
Fine, I can do $20. Would you like the Ralphie Doppelganger or Tommy Realfinger? Also have her fumes.
Perfumes?
Top merch. At my house. Very aware. Aware house indeed.
I’ll be in touch
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Okay, I don’t recommend responding to spam but a long time ago I did. Had to search for this one but I found it. And no, it’s not spam…
https://hubpages.com/entertainment/Fun-With-Spam
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Thank you for including your emails back and forth for our enjoyment Pete. I loved them and they gave me such a good laugh. You obviously used your past experience in writing your flash as it too had me smiling.
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Pete, I could clearly see this scene unfold as both physical and verbal slapstick! You expressed the Nanjo vibe, for certain. And your series of responses to the good Doctor wanting to send you money but not help your town is hysterical. Thanks for sharing!
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[…] have become determined to overcome my fear Flash Fiction, by continuing to practice! Over at the Carrot Ranch, Charli hosts a weekly prompt. Ths week’s one is very unusual and definitely appealed to my […]
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Having trouble loading the link…
I’ll try again later.
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Got it….
Bwah haaahhhhaa – very good. 🙂
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Jef Leppard! That’s a great twist on Mrs. DuParts name! Clever flash Judy!
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The Funeral
Senor Nanjo Castille sat alone in the church except for his bodyguards. No one else dared attend. They crossed the line this time.
As the Mass for the Dead progressed his business adversary’s money laundering restaurant was destroyed. Twelve dead. The warehouse was next. Fourteen dead. Then the offices. One hundred dead.
In his adversary’s desperation the expected fight around the church began. It lasted ten minutes.
When the service ended Senor Castille walked behind the caskets outside the church and viewed the mess in the street. Then he went to the cemetery to bury his wife and daughter.
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Great twist.
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Frank, this reads like the opener to a crime boss thriller. Great take on Nanjo!
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[…] 9, 2017, prompt: In 99 words (no more, no less) write a fictional story about The Real Nanjo Castille. You can set any gender, era or genre to reveal the character behind the mystery. You can also […]
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Here is my contribution in case my ping-back doesn’t work. ❤ https://colleenchesebro.com/2017/11/10/freedom/
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Thanks, Colleen! This reads like the “rest of the story” behind many such Nanjos.
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Thanks, Charli. So true. ❤
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Oh the lurking innuendo indeed…ha, you weren’t kidding when you said the dongle is never going away! Hopefully Male Enhancement doesn’t linger, ha! But onto thunder and lake-effect snow…I have never heard of either. Blizzards, yes, growing up in Suffolk on the east coast of England’s East Anglia, those Siberian winds howled their way through mean, bitter cold winters when the ploughed fields felt as hard as cement. But never in October! It does look so beautiful though and I love your description, so beautiful as always. You had me going with those cats too…clever. As is your flash. Isn’t it great where 99 words take us? I will be back for sure Charli, and I will be asking: “Will the real Nanjo Castille please stand up?” 😀 ❤
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Hee, hee, Sherri, if Male Enhancement lingers longer than four hours, I’ll call a doctor! Wait until you read the latest — Mr. Castille is now interested in selling us dongles that require a forklift. 😀
Oh, wow, Siberian winds over East Anglia sounds epic. I was walking Bobo on Monday through the ski trails on the ridge and though I couldn’t see Lake Superior, I could see charcoal gray clouds pressing up from where I knew the lake to be. It was partly cloudy, blue and white, but that dark mass was different. It flowed a different direction, it had a different texture, it was massive and held back. By the time we reached the house, the hold broke and that gray mass rose and flowed overhead, beneath the cloud and sky. Within 30 minutes it was snowing. Wild!
You bring Nanjo back, standing!
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LOL!!!!!! We’ll need an entire hospital if we buy that forklift 😀 😀 😀 Oh Charli, that’s too funny…I’ll be chuckling all day now, and boy, I need a good laugh!
You paint a glorious picture with your wonderful description of your walk with Bobo. The weather here is very changeable too, we can have rain, sun, sleet and snow all in one day and think nothing of it. I remember similar grey masses like that lying low and heavy in the sky, pressing down until they burst with snow. To see that magnified over Lake Superior must be breathtaking. I feel like I just took that walk with you! Ahh…a good laugh and brisk walk along the ski trails with you has set me up for the day…thank you my friend! 🙂 ❤
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PS I guess Nanjo really did stand up…just not in ways we expected haha!!! 😀
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Can dei;ver
The ‘student of concern’ meeting was heated.
“Well”, said the ELA teacher, “His spelling and grammar are low even for a second language student. He doesn’t even try.”
“Sure he does. He tries to jerk your chain. This kid is smarter than you think. Just looking for attention.”
“Yes, I agree. The kid does ok in math. Great flexible thinking and problem solving.”
“That may be, but this kid’s behavior alarms me. He has no empathy and no boundaries. I worry he’s going to grow up to be a sociopath.”
“Right. And Nanjo Castille could become president.”
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Hmmm….some might think we have a Nanjo clone in the White House…
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Scary story!
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Sociopaths are intelligent; it’s that lack of empathy that makes the combination frightening. The duality of the final line expresses much about how heated debates that ignore warning signals are frightening for another reason. And that’s to ignore the warnings. Thought-provoking flash, D.!
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I thought your spammer might be a less extreme version of the loner with a grievance – is that stereotype? I really don’t know – who gets hold of a gun. Yes, it happens even in England! Ties nicely with a couple of recent reads, one set in the corner of the country where I grew up:
Two mysteries against a backdrop of rampage and riot http://annegoodwin.weebly.com/1/post/2017/11/two-mysteries-against-a-backdrop-of-rampage-and-riot.html
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Loner with a grievance would be a stereotype if you described him with cliches and expectations, otherwise it would be an archetype. Perhaps the Jester? A touch of Rebel. Maybe Magician.
And I’m weary of the stereotypes in the US grabbing guns. Even Annie is sick grabbing her gun and ready to gather ’em all up and dump them in the boiling cauldron that is Old Faithful in Yellowstone. Off to see what’s rampaging on your side of the pond.
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[…] Carrot Ranch Prompt (11/09/2107): In 99 words (no more, no less) write a fictional story about The Real Nanjo Castille. You can set any gender, era or genre to reveal the character behind the mystery. You can also imagine the daily life of The Real Nanjo Castille. Go where the prompt leads. […]
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My apologies…
The Real Nanjo Castille
Blat of mule’s bray, and Nanjo rattled into the village square. People grumbled, crowding the buckboard wagon. They’d been waiting since dawn. The stench of unwashed clothes hung heavy in the morning heat.
“Sorry, sorry!” Nanjo called. “My last stop had dire need of my services, but I’ve saved my best for you!”
He reached behind him and flipped a tarp back. The crowd gasped at the rows of golden bars gleaming in the sun.
“Accept no substitutes! The Real Nanjo Castille soap, a heavenly marriage of Greek olive oil and Viking lye, will cure all your laundry ills!”
https://huldermn.wordpress.com/2017/11/11/the-real-nanjo-castille/
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Castille! Soap! You did well to misdirect the expectation with the “golden bars.” I didn’t see the soap coming though you placed it right under my nose with the dirty laundry! Good one, Liz!
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Charli, this has got to be the best challenge yet. I loved it. Here is mine: https://robbiesinspiration.wordpress.com/2017/11/12/carrotranch-flash-fiction-challenge-the-clone/
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Inspired by the spammer: Hilarity ensures!
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Glad you enjoyed it, Robbie! I enjoyed your flash!
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[…] Charli Mill’s over at The Carrot Ranch, recently ran a fantastic Flash Fiction Rodeo. The various contests attracted a few entries by spammers, one of which has raised a bit of a laugh by Charli and the contest leader, Geoff le Pard. You can read Charli’s amusing post about this particular spam post here: https://carrotranch.com/2017/11/09/november-9-flash-fiction-challenge-2/. […]
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I am new to your challenges thanks to Robbie Cheadle, so will post here, and try a link.
The Different Sides of Me
I Nanjo Castille sit in my office staring at funeral home handouts. When with the public, I am calm, reassuring, kind and almost stoic. The mourning around me is not my own. When time permits, I write nonsensical flash fiction that looks like spam and submit it to Carrot Ranch. It eases the pain I see on a daily basis. I absolutely hate good-byes, those of others or my own. At day’s end, I loose my tied back hair, hang the suit up, and ride the long way home on my Harley enjoying the smells and sights of life.
https://susansleggs.wordpress.com/2017/11/12/carrotranch-flash-fiction-challenge-the-different-sides-of-me/
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Welcome to the Carrot Ranch, Susan. Thanks for introducing us to the real Nanjo.
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Hi Susan, I am so thrilled to see you here at Carrot Ranch joining in the fun. A lovely response to the prompt.
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Welcome to the Ranch, Susan! Delighted to know you followed Robbie over here (unless that was her clone…)
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[…] silliness is doubly inspired. It’s partly in response to Charli’s flash fiction prompt for this week: In 99 words (no more, no less) write a story about The Real Nanjo Castille, who was […]
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This post had me laughing so hard.
https://99monkeysblog.wordpress.com/2017/11/13/the-most-interesting-man-in-the-world-nanjo-castille-flash-fiction/
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Your post had me laughing, too!
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Thanks for joining in on the laugh, Deborah! 😀
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[…] as an entry into the Carrot Ranch Rodeo Contest #2: Little and Laugh. You can read the email in Charli’s post, which also includes the challenge to In 99 words (no more, no less) write a fictional story about […]
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[…] as Charli points out in her latest Flash Fiction contest here, one of the funniest parts of the contest was the one who didn’t enter. We all fell in love […]
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Thanks for joining us with all the laughs, Barb!
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[…] This story is in response to this week’s prompt from the Carrot Ranch: […]
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Some dignity for Nanjo.
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[…] Carrot Ranch – 11-09-17 […]
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We’ve all done our part to make Nanjo immortal, with delightful results! 🙂
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Nanjo rules . . . thankfully not! Here is my turn on what happened with Nanjo Castille! https://fictionplayground.wordpress.com/2017/11/14/the-story-of-nanjo-carrot-ranch-weekly-flash-11-09-17/
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Nanjo Castille, the happiest of accidents to roll into the Carrot Ranch!
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Nanjo rules, today! Maybe he’ll see he has a talent to tickle the funny bones and go about marketing his knockoffs differently.
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Oh boy…still working on my Nanjo Castille. I’ll be in later…I hope!
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With all the other excellent entries – I’m not going to write up another one. I will wait for yours though 😉
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Not sure I’m going to make it, either. I’ve had a terrible headache for two solid days and it is just not going away. Making writing impossible.
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Just take care of yourself!
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Want me to ask Nanjo if he can get you a case discount on Ti;leeNol? Take care, Lisa!
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LOL Yes, that might be good. 😀
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Too much bitCHcoin for the pain relieve;rs!
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This Nanjo joke is one that will serve us well in the humor department for a long time, I suspect. 😀
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Hi Charli, as always, galloping in by the skin of my teeth/hooves/chaps! No idea where this came from, no idea at all…but here’s my take on the elusive Nanjo Castille…
Aegean Dream
Sunset diamonds scattered bright the Aegean Sea.
Summer warmed my bare shoulders there, high above the glassy plain beneath the ancient Pepper Tree.
Sea Nymph’s breeze whispered tales of gods and glory and the Minotaur while I clutched his words to my chest: scrawled on yellowed paper he declared his ageless love while I dreamt.
I listened for his voice through the rustle of the small, crisp leaves; for the step to his music as I followed my pan piper.
‘I am Nanjo Castille’, he breathed into my hair.
I reached to touch him.
But he was never there.
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You reached in to the Aegean Sea and drew forth a beauty, Sherri! Dust off your chaps and know you rode well. Your flash is both haunting and lyrical, the grasping of something that feels real and yet isn’t there.
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Aww thanks Charli! The very name Nanjo Castille conjures up Spanish tones, but I went with the Greek angle to add to the mystery and stir things up a bit. After all, Nanjo could be anybody… 😉
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Thank you for your posts. Hope you find some time to read/keep reading my story, too.
Would you consider recommending my blog to your readers/followers?
They would have a chance of reading a blog still in the process of being written – and a woman rediscovered.
Have a great November! X
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I recommend you read the amazing writers that gather here each week. You passed by lots of fantastic stories to comment here. Interesting, too given this week’s prompt. I approved your comment in the hopes that you might join what we are doing. You appear to be new to blogging.
Check out what we are doing at Carrot Ranch. All writers are welcome to join in the weekly challenges. No one is expected to read each other blogs. It’s best to comment directly on a post’s content — that shows you took time to read.
It takes time to build a platform. Poke around the Ranch Archives and you’ll find some tips on platform building. You’ll get the hang of it!
Be mindful of what’s considered author spam. We already have a Spammer in Residence and his name is Nanjo Castille.
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Thanks for all the generous insight! 🙂
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We’re a community here and I hope you stick around! 🙂
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[…] Geoff Le Pard and all who entered his contest. And we’ve had fun with Spammer in Residence, Nanjo Castille. He seems to be having fun, […]
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Quite a bit late, Charli. I thought I’d posted this but apparently not…better late than…as they say.
What’s a Body to Do?
Hank looked down at the latest donation.
“Bit grizzled, Phil. None of his organs will be top quality…”
“Check his pockets. See if he’s go a name.”
“Huh, waddayaknow? A bloody diary. Here’s the name. Nanjo Castille!”
“Not from around here, I guess.”
“Small mercies. What’s it say?”
“Okay… ‘My name is Nanjo Tyrone Castille. At the orphanage, they said I’d been left outside the Rialto Theater in South Pasadena on December 25, 1947. The Captain from Castile was playing. Two nuns, Sisters Nancy and Josephine found me…’
“That’s it?”
“The rest is blank?”
“Yup!”
“Odd.”
“Great movie, though.”
“Agreed.”
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Yes! Never too late! And now we have the full name and a potential movie. Thanks, Bill!
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